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Vol. 96

Teachings of Shri Mahayogi

Satsangha, Kyoto, 2005

The Connection Between Ahimsa, Love and Jealousy

The Way of the Lover Who Loves God’s Joy:
The Psychological Aspects Symbolized by Radha and the Gopi

The Attitude of Bhakti: The State of Lila
Without Having Two Counterparts in Relation to One Another

When Yoga Deepens, Emotions Become Sanctified,
and Compassion is Born

Faith Must be Built Upon a Reliable Foundation, Upon the Truth

While Performing Your Duties in Society,
Be Unattached to Environments and Circumstances

Don’t Label Your Mind’s Characteristics
and Rather Remain in a State of Suspension

Skeletons are the Symbol of Something like Remnants of the Material World

The Pure Consciousness is Easier to Grasp
The Moment You Wake Up in the Morning

Darshan—the Greatest Grace


Testimonies from Actual Practitioners

Specialized Meditation Course, 2020
—Exposing the Actual Practice of Meditation!:
Anecdotes from the Experience of Real Practice
Deepening Meditation

Speaker: Madhri

Aiming Towards the Realization of the Truth:
• 1 – What are the Most Important Things in Life?
December 12, 2020

• 2 – The Breakthrough of Meditation
December 26, 2020

* * * * * * * * * *

Teachings of Shri Mahayogi

Translation of Satsangha

Saturday, January 29, 2005, Mahayogi Ashrama, Kyoto

This week, the weather has been unseasonably spring-like.

Among the usual participants, Ms. Karashima and Ms. Yamashita, from Imabari, Ehime prefecture, are sitting joyfully right in front of Shri Mahayogi. Ms. Nakajima, from Wakayama prefecture, is also showing a lively expression.

Faces filled with joy tightly surround Shri Mahayogi, and within the tranquil silence, Shri Mahayogi slowly grants darshan.

The Connection Between Ahimsa, Love and Jealousy

Ms. Karashima: When I attended Shri Mahayogi’s Jayanti, para-bhakti left an impression on me, so some time later, I read various parts about para-bhakti in the book, Bhakti Yoga (by Swami Vivekananda), and it said that in the list of qualities conducive to purity, the one idea that deserves particular attention is ahimsa (non-injury to others), and that the test of ahimsa is the absence of jealousy. When it comes to not harming others in relation to ahimsa, I can understand that everything is equal so nothing should be harmed, but I cannot quite understand what it means to not have any jealousy.

MASTER: When you look at the reason why jealousy arises, whether towards a beloved person or an object, it is because the affection and attachment to the object are heightened too much and have gone too far towards possessiveness, the sense of “mine.” Conversely, as soon as one is obstructed from someone else or has a sense of that, the power of attachment gets even stronger. Therefore, you can regard jealousy, after all, as the result of the concrete appearance of “me and mine,” which is ego and attachment. Ahimsa means to not hurt others or other things. If one asserts “me and mine,” then it causes hurt to the objects that are in the various relationships, and as its opposite, if there is no “me and mine,” then one cannot hurt anything—ahimsa is established. After all, jealousy is regarded as an act of violence or harm, arising from “me and mine.” That is the connection between jealousy and ahimsa.

Ms. Karashima: (with a small voice) I see.

Ms. Karashima: I think love exists at the opposite end of jealousy; unless one loves someone intensely, jealousy doesn’t arise either. So, if love does not go in the direction of attachments, if it’s pure love, then probably jealousy doesn’t arise, I think.

MASTER: Right.

Ms. Wada (Dharmini): On the contrary, love may have an enormous power, so there was a time I thought that we cannot necessarily say that having no jealousy is a good thing. Jealousy is the exact opposite of love, is that right?

MASTER: When it comes to love, too, there are various differences in what that love contains: there is the relative, common state of love, the state of love that is the quality of Yoga, and the state of true Love called prema. Therefore, even if you say “love,” as long as jealousy arises, then it is regarded as still having the content of common love. The same thing can be said of ahimsa, of course.

Ms. Karashima: I thought that when people hurt one another, jealousy might be hidden there. I’ve now come to understand that since love and jealousy are exact opposites, if there is jealousy, ahimsa is not valid. So, it is easier to discriminate by focusing on whether it arises from Love or not, and so I thought that I don’t need to think so much about jealousy, but is that the right approach?

MASTER: Love is not just limited to romantic love and such things. For example, if the ego, which everyone has, is cherished, then that is self-love. Also, the various thoughts arising from ego—that too means one is in love with the thoughts of one’s own mind. [One protects] one’s own thoughts so as not to get hurt, and often, by attacking others, being jealous toward and hurting others, one satisfies one’s own self-love; that is quite a common case. Therefore, love is, so to speak, another name for a sort of attachment. If you think of it this way, you will really come to recognize that love is followed by jealousy, violence, and harm. However, if one continues to learn Yoga, one will come to learn that love isn’t actually like that, and that real Love does exist. One will practice the discipline of choosing the altruistic love that is good for or brings happiness to others, rather than self-love, even at one’s own sacrifice. Even if love itself is the same, the way of love changes. If that happens, the inciting of jealousy, harm and violence will come to an end. Para-bhakti is the much purer form of love, so naturally there is no room for jealousy or violence to enter there.

The Way of the Lover Who Loves God’s Joy:
The Psychological Aspects Symbolized by Radha and the Gopi

Ms. Umeda (Madhri): Recently, I was reading Paramahamsa and there was a part in which Shri Mahayogi spoke about para-bhakti, referring to the episode of Krishna and Radha: Radha was sad about Krishna and another gopi playing together, and when her female friend thought that she was sad because she was jealous, she asked her, “Are you crying because you are so sad?” Radha answered, “It is not that. I am sad because she does not know how to make Krishna happy, she cannot make him happy.” I was amazed by her. Then Shri Mahayogi mentioned that that expresses the feeling of Radha; she was only thinking about making her beloved Krishna happy… I felt that this was very different from the mundane, normal jealousy. It was amazing that she was thinking solely about the happiness of the beloved, but I also wondered, what was the difference between Radha and the other gopi? And I suppose that Krishna must have had fun playing with the other gopi too, yet I was wondering, what does it mean to truly make Krishna happy?

MASTER: (laughing) Yes, that must have been from Bhagavata Purana or Gita Govinda, Sananda?

Sananda: I don’t quite know the classic texts, but it must have been Bhagavata Purana.

MASTER: That anecdote has also been passed down in the form of a poem. I think that it is the episode that reflects the state of Yoga—well, “state of Yoga” sounds a little too solemn—the prema of bhakti yoga, or the level of purity of love, and such. Now, with regard to the differences between Radha and the gopi, it is this episode that attempts to express prema, kama or rati in the forms of love there—the differences between the same love, yet within the human mind. So, probably, the gopi were seeking not only to make Krishna happy, but they were also seeking Krishna as an object of their own happiness; whereas Radha, on the other hand, only wished for Krishna’s happiness and acted solely for that, rather than pursuing her own happiness and enjoyment—there are probably these differences. Therefore, the reason as to why she said it was not jealousy is because it is such a pure love that Radha does not wish to possess Krishna, nor is she trying to love her own pleasure, but she only loves Krishna’s happiness—that is the substance of it.

Ms. Umeda (Madhri): Does the happiness of Krishna indicate becoming one with God and such?

MASTER: It is, so to speak, simply about playing or sporting in a state free of jealousy, ego, and such things that the mind creates, attachments and pain-bearing obstacles, and that is all.

Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): When I read the story, I thought about how arrogant Radha was. By just reading the text, I thought that her being able to declare that only she can please him, was arrogant.

MASTER: Oh, I see, that’s another way of saying it. (laughter from all)

Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): Well then, that means the reader’s side was arrogant. (roaring laughter from everyone)

MASTER: (roaring laughter) Surely it is so. That is the first time I’ve ever heard of that interpretation. (laughter from all)

Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): I truly thought it was so arrogant. How can she dare say that she is the only one who can please him. Why is it not possible for the other gopi to please him, it must be.

MASTER: Well, indeed, that’s a new theory. (laughs)

Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): Is that so? Doesn’t anyone think of this?

MASTER: Not sure. Sananda, what do you say? (laughs)

Sananda: Hmm…never thought about it that way before.

MASTER: How about Sanatana? (laughs)

Sananda: Well, those are just symbols… (Everyone chuckles.)

MASTER: Let’s do a little research on this. (laughter from all)

Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): Previously, Shri Mahayogi has mentioned that even if it comes from ego, it’s fine to have an intention to please God. If so, even if I thought Radha was arrogant, I can presume that her intentions are fine as well. But, the thought of seeing it as arrogance itself is a mistake, is that correct?

MASTER: Hmm… (thinks for a while) As far as what the scene of the story expresses, it does not include descriptions to such a concrete extent as to say what type of women the gopi were, nor how they interacted with Krishna—and that is the symbolic part. It is not described more than in terms of the form of Radha, and that of all the other gopi. The overall symbol is that the gopi symbolize all humans, yet especially Radha, who is among them, is depicted symbolizing someone whose bhakti has deepened further. That means that it is understood that the other gopi are indeed the same souls, yet they’re still in the place where their practice towards mastery is halfway done, and that is the tacit understanding about this story.

Dayamati: When I read that story, I thought, what confidence Radha has. (Shri Mahayogi and everyone laugh.) And she loves Krishna more than anyone else.

MASTER: Ummm, I see. (All break into laughter.)

Dayamati: I took it to mean that Radha knows that the deeper the love, the happier Krishna is, and so she feels that her love is the deepest.

(Shri Mahayogi seems surprised by everyone’s various interpretations.)

Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): But Shri Mahayogi’s explanation that all the other gopi are still acknowledging their own happiness, but Radha is nothing like that, only thinking about the happiness of Krishna—now that I’m taking that in, it makes sense to me.

MASTER: I think one can sense this from what is implied in the overall story.

Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): (laughing) I am sorry, I acknowledge that my take was so shallow. But like Dayamati-san said, I really thought that she had such self-confidence and was so arrogant.

Sananda: What I thought of when I read it is that Radha, for the Joy of Krishna, will not hesitate even to withdraw herself. She is truly thinking solely about the other, and acts based on that. That is why I was amazed by it.

MASTER: I see…interesting, if I keep asking each person (roaring laughter from all), then there will be various interpretations. Are there any others?

Ms. Karashima: I was envious. I’ve never loved like that, and I felt envious, wishing I could be mad like that towards God. She must also have confidence…

MASTER: How about Ambika? (laughs)

Ambika: I think that it’s an ideal. (Shri Mahayogi laughs.)

Sananda: Among the gurubai we talk about how Shri Mahayogi must be thinking this way or that way, replacing Shri Mahayogi with Krishna, and often, our opinions differ; so, to have confidence…for example, only as an example, in the case of Sanatana, he has expressed that he doesn’t have what it takes to live up to Shri Mahayogi’s wishes for him, which I feel would be great if I too could confidently think that way. (Shri Mahayogi laughs.) I felt that I am not able to be confident to that extent. That is why I thought that Radha has such a degree of pure love.

MASTER: (laughing) Well, there is a big difference between your opinion and Takagi’s opinion.

Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): I lack enough studying, I need to study more.

Sanatana: But, observing the fact that Radha does not go jumping in to separate them, but rather, stays alone crying—she knows that they are with him and they can’t please him, yet there is a necessity for everyone to have an opportunity to encounter God, and while she may be thinking that Krishna might have a lot of difficulties with them, nonetheless, he is also having fun there, as a matter of fact. So, in that case, as Sananda mentioned earlier, perhaps she takes the attitude that it is better that she doesn’t go interfere with them, in which normally there may be jealousy, and from the understanding of all this, she might be purely lamenting the inconveniences that may arise there. If she was truly full of confidence, she might just go barging in immediately, and tell that gopi to leave him be. (laughs)

MASTER: Hmm, I see. Well, there are so many opinions. (everyone bursts into laughter) Hearing you all, I just discovered, or rather noticed, one thing now. You are viewing Radha and the gopi as two people or multiple people, however, I view it as them actually being simply symbols of psychological aspects. Thinking from this view—Radha says, “Because that gopi does not know how to make Krishna happy, I am sad,” and it’s not that Radha is saying, “I know”; neither is she saying that she herself can make Krishna happy, nor that she knows how; Radha is simply sad that that gopi doesn’t know… That means that it simply indicates nothing more than that the gopi is still of an immature mind, that is, having the state of the mind that still has ego. Thinking from this perspective, all of your impressions can be settled without contradictions. Otherwise, if Radha was arrogant or too self-confident, then it doesn’t make any sense for the story to be told. (laughs) What is your opinion, Nao [Ms. Oohashi]?

Ms. Oohashi: Since I read this story when I just began learning Yoga, I felt similar to Takagi-san or Dayamati-san. But I also thought that, probably, there must be some different meaning (laughs). I knew nothing about Radha or Krishna themselves, or even their symbolic meanings, at all. I think that we probably view it such that Krishna is God and Radha is the lover of God, but in short, we see their relationship to be as when human beings love one another in romantic relationships. However, when I read the book, it said that “Krishna is one and the same as Radha”—in sum, that which is One is enjoying the world, separated into two. Because that is how stories are born, I thought that God and the devotees who love God, too, when the devotees love God intensely, they all would become the same, [One]. That is how I came to accept this story. Then, if I could truly be able to think the way Radha does—I thought that it would be difficult…but as time goes, I’m gradually starting to understand this in me, and I really want to completely become like that.


Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): For example, we adore Shri Mahayogi so much, and when seeing Shri Mahayogi speak to another person, we wouldn’t get jealous, but would be so happy for that person; whereas in the case of a common, romantic love, then we wouldn’t like that. So then, the relation between Krishna and Radha, when she is not happy about Krishna playing with the other gopi, and is rather expressing it in such way—that is why I took it as arrogance.

MASTER: But even then, it alludes to the fact that the gopi symbolize the undeveloped mind of a human. And in the case of Radha, I think that what she solely symbolizes is what it is to entirely serve Krishna, who is God, and please him.

Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): I understand. I’m fine with it. (laughter from all)

The Attitude of Bhakti: The State of Lila
Without Having Two Counterparts in Relation to One Another

Yogadanda: I saw a dream this morning. Shri Mahayogi appeared for a long time and there were various scenes. In one of the scenes, I met Shri Mahayogi after a long while. Shri Mahayogi was in New York, and even though I met him after three months or so, and regardless of thinking about Shri Mahayogi often until that point, once Shri Mahayogi actually appeared in front of me, I went cold and I had no idea what to do, and I felt like I saw an awkward part of myself…I should say an immature part or… May I ask, what is getting in the way?

MASTER: (after some silence) Going back to the relation between Radha and Krishna, everyone is familiar with the five attitudes of bhakti, right? It might be a sense of peace, or that of being as a servant in a master-servant relationship, or a motherly attitude toward a child, a giving relationship, or a close relationship between friends… However, the relationship between Radha and Krishna, is the state that is established after these relationships of two counterparts have disappeared, where that which is One enjoys Joy, or sports in the state of being separated—lila. Therefore, perhaps your dream may have ended up such a way because your thoughts of having two counterparts is still strong. So it might be better if you just blow these conditions away and enjoy (laughs), or rather, play, and lighten up your feelings.


Ms. Takagi (Ranjani): May I ask something basic? These five attitudes of bhakti—do they level up in the order Shri Mahayogi mentioned them?

MASTER: Regardless of which attitude, bhakti yoga itself can take one to the goal of bhakti yoga, so in that sense, there are no differences. However, as explained now, if various psychological states are strictly compared with these attitudes, some order arises.

Ambika: What attitude is closest to amazement? The first thing I feel is always to be amazed. I am wondering where that fits into the five attitudes…being amazed or being overwhelmed.

MASTER: Well, that fits into the second or the fifth attitude. That means that of a servant, a relationship of servitude, or a romantic relationship.

When Yoga Deepens, Emotions Become Sanctified,
and Compassion is Born

Ms. Umeda (Madhri): Shri Mahayogi has said before that in bhakti yoga, all kinds of emotions are sanctified. Normally, emotions such as anger and jealousy are not very nice, but would you please teach us how they become sacred?

MASTER: Not only in bhakti yoga, but in any Yoga, if one’s state has deepened, the mind comes to have the quality of sattva, and it comes to be sanctified. When that happens, feelings such as anger and jealousy disappear. And instead, such things as loving-kindness and compassion, such thoughtfulness will arise and replace them. It can be, so to speak, toward all living beings, or there may arise a resentfulness at seeing sorrow and pain, or anger towards the ignorance and pain-bearing obstacles that exist there…but this is not the usual type of anger, it is rather like compassion. Jealousy would no longer exist at that point.


Faith Must be Built Upon a Reliable Foundation, Upon the Truth

Ms. Yamashita: (folds palms together and bows) Please…I would like to be taught the importance of faith.

MASTER: Usually, the mind is accustomed to seeking something and depending on something, and through that, it becomes happy, and at times it becomes sad, or suffers—it is constantly disturbed. A reliable foundation is quite difficult to find. For such a mind, to encounter a reliable anchor, that which has been founded on a huge rock—that is called faith.

Faith when one prays to God during difficult times—that is one form of faith. Yet, since there is, so to speak, a transactional relationship that can be seen here and there—such as there being some kind of suffering or wishing for God to take it away—and since even these conditions, too, continue to change, most of the time this can never become a reliable foundation. However, by having faith towards the Truth, the mind can cease to be in an unsettled state and remain in a calm state. As faith deepens gradually, the mind can sense more tranquility. Therefore, faith is something that has to be built upon the Truth. And in the end, it will lead you to arrive at finding your real Self, or the Truth of the entire universe, or that which is called God. In this sense, faith is quite an important thing as you live your life.

As mentioned now, when it comes to faith, faith itself will also change—becoming deeper, purer. Therefore, faith is something that can grow. In order for this to happen, it boils down to learning the Truth and applying It in practice through one’s actions—in other words, having the earnestness and seriousness to work hard to act upon it will deepen one’s faith.

While Performing Your Duties in Society,
Be Unattached to Environments and Circumstances

Vishoka: This topic comes up from time to time. I understand that when it comes to practicing and disciplining oneself in order to attain mastery, we need to take that on with our entire body and soul, but it is very difficult to adjust to how actively or passively we should deal with worldly matters. I think that it’s not so ideal to stay totally hands-off and become fatalistic in one’s attitude, but, for example, there are conditions where an individual completely ignores what he or she eats for the next day and solely focuses on just living in the now, and he or she considers others somewhat, well, (bitter laugh) I often get sworn at for “being irresponsible” by my family. (roaring laughter from everyone) The adjustment at some level is difficult, but is there something like a middle way? Or should I have the approach of being more bold, prioritizing what must be prioritized, and leaving the rest alone, for it will take care of itself?

MASTER: Well, I might also be the one to get sworn at (laughs), so I’m not sure if I can give good advice. How about Sananda? (laughter from all) Since you’re basically an exemplary yogi?

Sananda: No, I myself wanted to ask the same question.

MASTER: (laughing) Come on, you must be able to . Well, everyone inevitably creates his or her own circumstances; it could be with family or being single, could be a job, or if you are living in Kyoto, various customary regional duties… Within all that, naturally, if you have a spouse or children, you must fulfill your duties towards your family, and with regard to your job, too, you have a job in order to support your family in some way, and of course, it is to support yourself too. In order to do that, some level of social interaction is necessary. And this is the same with a regional community, too. There may be differences between being proactive or passive, however, you can simply fulfill [those duties] appropriately. And, there is no need to concern yourself too much about praise or criticism from others (laughs); in that sense, I think it is better to make the internal practice the main priority, and rather be indifferent to external environments and circumstances. (laughs)

Sananda: So, being indifferent means not caring even though we are being sworn at.

MASTER: (laughing) That’s right, exactly.

Sananda: I often go through conflict when I concentrate on sadhana in Yoga, or on Yoga as a whole, I become indifferent and neglectful toward everything else, for example, household chores. I think that, on the other hand, in the sense of doing the practice and discipline of Yoga in action, or practicing karma yoga in action, or bhakti yoga in action, serving or devoting myself to my family or people around me, that itself is exactly the practice of Yoga, of course.

MASTER: Yes, indeed.

Sananda: So then, in daily life, in such a relationship, should we make the practice of karma yoga and bhakti yoga thorough, putting them at the center of our discipline?

MASTER: It can be said to be so, from scene to scene.

Sananda: Yes, does that mean for each scene?

MASTER: Yes. In the scene of your job, you have to put the work at the core and do your best.

Sananda: Work at a job is something that has no end, so at a job just fulfill the duty at work, then, for example, spend your own personal time properly and devote yourself to practicing sadhana.

MASTER: Indeed.

Sananda: And we should study Yoga firmly.

MASTER: Yes, time should be allotted well like that, in other words, control the amount of work [at your job].

Sananda: In the sense of concentrating on Yoga, in a way, carelessness or disinterest, or selfishness might be needed, I think.

MASTER: You may say so.

Sananda: So, is that okay?

MASTER: Yes, you should do it like that.

Sananda: Yet, I should not be too attached to it. (laughter from all)

MASTER: Of course. You can say that for both situations; to remain in the middle path is an important part.

Sananda: Does that mean that karma yoga or bhakti yoga at work or with family should also be practiced with the same eagerness, or in other words, as thoroughly as I practice sadhana when I am alone or when I meditate?

MASTER: Right, it is the same.

Sananda: So we should not make one or the other superior or inferior.

MASTER: (laughing) There is no difference.

Don’t Label Your Mind’s Characteristics
and Rather Remain in a State of Suspension

Ms. Hasegawa: My mind is weak and I am so concerned about each and every thing that people say about me that I get depressed. What should I do?

MASTER: In order to get rid of that for certain, Yoga is most effective. However, even Yoga too cannot be completed in a day. After years or months of daily learning and actual training, practice, and discipline, one will notice that things within one’s own self have changed. The day-to-day changes may not be seen by the eye.

Ms. Hasegawa: Yes. But actually, things have improved, gradually.

MASTER: It’s already been many months. It’s important to not have complex-like thoughts about it either. Saying, “I’m like this, I’m like that”—the mind is, in a way, as if it is constantly self-hypnotizing itself; that is why what you think becomes established the next day. (laughs) Therefore, rather, it might be better to say, “I don’t know,” and, “I don’t understand anything.”

Ms. Hasegawa: What? I don’t understand… What does that mean? Is it that even though I am concerned about what someone says, I respond, “I don’t understand,” or something like, “I don’t understand that Japanese”? (laughter from all)

MASTER: Well, that’s one way to use it. (roaring laughter from everyone)

Ms. Hasegawa: What was Shri Mahayogi indicating with what he said…?

MASTER: You shouldn’t simply label [or have a fixed point of view] about your own personality or tendencies. It’s best just to remain [in a state of] not knowing about your own personality, how it is this way or that way. That is the Truth, in other words, since your body and mind are changing moment by moment, you can’t arrive at any label that, “I’m this way and that way”… That in and of itself is vague and it is not the Truth, actually.

(Ms. Hasegawa silently thinks for a while, but afterwards, looks up brightly at Shri Mahayogi’s face.)


Ms. Oohashi: Earlier, when Shri Mahayogi mentioned, “I don’t know,” is that the same as becoming a bit stupid?

MASTER: You don’t even know whether it’s stupid or wise (roaring laughter from everyone)—that’s the better way to be. Although, you all think you are wise, perhaps.

Ms. Oohashi: We all tend to think well of our own selves.

MASTER: Right. However, there is no grounds to prove such a thing (laughs). That is how the mind arrives at conclusions, based on such vague and unreliable things. That is why I said, “It is as if the mind is self-hypnotizing itself.”

Ms. Karashima: Shri Mahayogi mentioned this in Paramahamsa. (Shri Mahayogi laughs.) When I read it, I thought that is how I should think about this—I don’t even know what ego is… I saw that if I struggle to understand it and search for it, I get even more confused, so I thought that I should just quit doing that, too.

MASTER: Exactly. That is why you should only see the Truth, because through Yoga you’re seeking the Truth, to reveal It and realize It. That is the aim; you must only look at the aim.

Ms. Karashima: When I notice something about myself in daily life, I realize that I acknowledge it through a very strange way of concentrating upon it.

MASTER: That is the delusion that the mind creates, in other words, it is like the way that maya works.

Ms. Karashima: After three years of coming here, I finally accept that the only thing I should try to understand is the Truth, and that there is no need for me to critically dig up the tendencies of my mind one by one. Through that, I feel at ease, or lighter. 

MASTER: This rigid version is what is called ignorance, truly a very powerful thing, as it is the cause that gives rise to pain-bearing obstacles and desire, and desire may change variously, nonetheless, ignorance is unchanging, always remaining there. However, even that is like a delusion created by the mind—it’s an error.

Therefore, it is better to say, “I don’t know.” As you’ve all experienced asana, and while you are continuing to practice asana, you may not notice this, yet when you stop practicing for a while and have a gap after having continued to practice for several years, you might have a sense of being lost. That means that although you may not have noticed it while practicing asana, when you are practicing, so to speak, you’re in the state of being suspended. It is the same with the mind as well, of course, as the mind too, so to say, is in the state of being suspended. If you label yourself this way or that way, you fall down on the ground, as opposed to [being suspended], and that becomes the power that gets you stuck there. Therefore, that habit must be reformed. It’s fine to be in suspension.

Ms. Karashima: Being suspended—does that mean there is a sense of lightness?

MASTER: Indeed, it is exactly that.


Ms. Nakajima: Even if I am not aware of it at the time, that sense of falling down to the ground happens not just with the body, but with the mind as well?

MASTER: While you’re practicing asana, if the meditation of bhakti yoga, karma yoga or jnana yoga deepen, then naturally, asana practice will come to an end. It is a smooth transition, therefore, there is no need to worry about [becoming lost]. However, in the case where one is only practicing asana, that can happen.

Skeletons are the Symbol of Something like Remnants of the Material World

Dayamati: Shri Mahayogi has taught us to make an endeavor in our daily lives to know contentment, and to make our meditation more the quality of sattva. As I was practicing that, a sense in which I felt like I was inside Narayana arose, then, meditation became easier. But last night or early in the morning, it could have been a dream, or it could have not been a dream, but there was a skeleton that appeared at my bedside, interestingly it was not scary, but real. I grabbed the bones and threw them away. (laughter from all) I then started to think that perhaps that could be a part of me. When I encounter such things, is it better if I act following my intuition, or should I ignore it? 

MASTER: Well, you probably can’t do anything other than follow your intuition in those cases. So eccentric. (laughter from all)

In Tibet, there are tangkas, which are Buddhist paintings. In them, at times, a skeleton is drawn in a pose just like Dakini, which is a type of god. Skeletons are, in a way, symbols of the physical materials in this world. Narayana, the Lord of the universe, the cosmic body—that is, it is the view that the body of this entire cosmos is the body of God—so even before the encounter, before it happened, if you were able to remain in the thought of Narayana, then, so to speak, the skeleton that appeared there is the dregs of the physical world, a residue—it is that kind of symbol. So that is fine. (laughs)

I imagined a famous print of a skeleton by Hokusai.1 The picture has a large skeleton in it.


[1] A Japanese ukiyo-e artist from the 17th to 18th centuries.

The Pure Consciousness is Easier to Grasp
The Moment You Wake Up in the Morning

Shachi: Last week, Shri Mahayogi said that the mind does not have an awareness, because the mind is something that is being witnessed, and that the Atman, which is pure, has awareness, but the mind doesn’t have it. So, the awareness referred to here is totally different from the mind’s thoughts?

MASTER: Yes, they’re different things.

Shachi: When we say awareness, from the sense of how we used to think, we are prone to have an image that is like an intention, as if these very vivid things we think we feel [are real]. But how should we grasp that awareness [you’ve mentioned]?

MASTER: The easiest way to understand it is precisely like the very moment you wake up in the morning. Even within this phase of an instant moment, the mind creates thoughts or the senses recognize external things, because of that it is often mistaken for consciousness. However, if one can truly cut apart the moment when one wakes up, then it is simply the state of awareness, that of the Knower and the Seer. Yet, in no time, that awareness becomes as if it is being assimilated into the thoughts of the mind, and one is deluded into thinking that the mind is the one that is being aware of something, through thinking about something. However, that is not pure. In other words, this is exactly what the Yoga Sutra states: “In all other cases the Seer is assimilated with the activities of the mind.”1 Therefore, what makes awareness be awareness is “the Seer remains in Its own natural state”2—as mentioned one sutra prior to that one.

Shachi: Probably that cannot be understood until we become Enlightened, but as Shri Mahayogi just explained it now, it now feels somewhat closer. (smiles)

MASTER: Well, it must be frustrating, but it is exactly what the initial sutra in the Yoga Sutra indicates. Then it is explained in a later sutra that, “The cause of the pain which is to be avoided is the conjunction of the Seer and the Seen.”3 That is how, at the subtle level, the mind takes over the real awareness, or that is how it seems to be that way.

For example, the consciousness of the Seer, or the Knower, is likened to light. But in front of it, the mind obstructs It, and further, through the mind, the external world is recognized. If that mind doesn’t exist, then nothing can be recognized. The world itself cannot be established.

Shachi: Is that pure Consciousness lively and vivid?

MASTER: Only That has Life, what is called Eternal Life—because only That is Existence, and That is indestructible, it never dies, and it is eternally existent.

Ms. Hasegawa: That is Knowledge itself, isn’t it—of “Existence, Knowledge, Bliss”?

MASTER: Well, when you hear the word “knowledge” you may tend to associate it with something encyclopedia-like (laughs), but it is not that meaning. It is Consciousness, rather than knowledge.

Ms. Hasegawa: Consciousness?

MASTER: It is more correct to say Consciousness.

Ms. Hasegawa: That Consciousness understands everything?

MASTER: (whispering) It understands nothing. (roaring laughter from all) Simply It understands Truth. You see, knowledge changes according to the time, the era, and the place. However, the Truth is changeless.

Ms. Hasegawa: So, is the only thing that It knows, “Everything is Brahman,” and nothing else?

MASTER: (laughing) Right, right. That is sufficient, it is fine not to know anything else.


Niranjan: Does the Pure Consciousness create the mind and everything else?

MASTER: Do you mean, did the Pure Consciousness create everything?

Niranjan: That Pure Consciousness is the Truth, it is Eternal and Independent, but is It also the cause that creates misunderstandings, delusions, attachments and everything?

MASTER: No, it is not. The twenty-four principles that compose this world are created by prakriti, a principle different from the Pure Consciousness. And a slight mistake in the workings of the mind is what creates ignorance, illusion. Ignorance has its cause in that mistake. Since originally it was brought about by a mistake, ignorance will be dissolved. Then what’s left will be Pure Consciousness alone.

Niranjan: So then is the cause of illusion ignorance?

MASTER: Yes. It is all name and all form in this world, and the dualistic relation of the self and others caused by these—such differentiations.

Niranjan: So then does that mean that thinking only of Pure Consciousness is beneficial?

MASTER: Yes. It is, in another name, God. If you remove the names and forms from all beings and things, then only God remains there. Only That is the Existence.

Niranjan: Arigatou. (Thanks in Japanese)


[1] Yoga Sutra: 1.4

[2] Yoga Sutra: 1.3

[3] Yoga Sutra: 2.17

Darshan—the Greatest Grace

Ms. Okunishi (Jayadevi): The other day, I heard about other gurubai’s feelings and I kept thinking about myself. Hearing others, I was thinking about when there was a time that even though I felt adoration towards Shri Mahayogi, yet I was not straightforward, and so I could not express openly or honestly. So I myself decided not to speak with Shri Mahayogi until real words arose in me. I kept attending Satsangha, kept practicing asana, controlling the mind, kept trying to focus at my job on the tasks in front of me and to do so diligently. Then I noticed that it was not like I was thinking about Shri Mahayogi all the time, but I was constantly being conscious of Shri Mahayogi no matter what I was doing; so then I tried to be away from Shri Mahayogi as hard as I could. Looking back, I felt like Shri Mahayogi might have been in the closest place. I don’t really know why I was being so perverse then (laughs).

MASTER: Well, regardless of how you think, as long as there is an object, that is the closest relation—that is, whether someone is a lover or an enemy (laughter from all), to put it in exaggerated terms.

Ms. Okunishi (Jayadevi): What I felt during that time is that Shri Mahayogi understands most, more than anyone else, what cannot be expressed in words.

MASTER: In addition, that shows how important darshan is. (towards beginners) Darshan means to receive a glance [from the Guru], to be seen [by the Guru].

Mr. Yasukawa: Please teach us the reason why darshan is important.

MASTER: Seekers and practitioners are still in a state of incompletion with respect to Satori. In order to complete it, there are teachings from scriptures, and it is also necessary to receive direct guidance from a Master, a Guru. However, in order to deepen the spiritual state much more surely, the grace bestowed by a Holy Being is crucial. And it is given through darshan, a glance. It is invisible, yet the blessing and inspiration is surely being poured into the practitioners.

Mr. Yasukawa: That means that by receiving darshan from Shri Mahayogi, even if we have not necessarily been able to actually feel it, we’re allowed to move surely towards Satori, step by step?

MASTER: That’s right.

* * *

Testimonies from a Practitioner

Specialized Meditation Course, 2020
—Exposing the Actual Practice of Meditation!:
Anecdotes from the Experience of Real Practice
Deepening Meditation

Speaker: Madhri

December 12, 2020

Aiming Towards the Realization of the Truth:
1 – What are the Most Important Things in Life?

December 12, 2020

What was important in tackling meditation—looking back at the path I’ve walked, I would like to share various insights and actual practices.


The Preparation for Meditation

When I tried to meditate, what I first felt was that it’s not really feasible to keep either the body or the mind stilled. My feet started to hurt immediately, and it was difficult to sit even for five minutes. The mind kept bringing up stuff from the past, and then kept feeling regret, and that generated delusions and anxieties, and that just kept going round and round within the world that the mind created. I was stunned—I didn’t realize that the mind kept moving so much.

First, I began from training to make myself become aware of my own state, to study about the body and the mind, and to make new habits. These were things such as committing to practice asana every single day, which I’d heard would benefit my preparation for meditation, and I followed through on it. At home, I disciplined myself to sit in siddhasana on the floor as much as possible. And, since I recognized the fact that the mind was full of unnecessary thoughts, [not only during meditation, but] actually throughout all of my waking hours, I disciplined myself to concentrate on the tasks at hand during daily life as well. For example, at my job, if there was a task I needed to perform, there was always a thought that lingered around the task—it could be emotions of like and dislike, or thinking about what happened in the past, or worrying about the outcome—so I practiced consciously to bring my concentration to the tasks right in front of me as much as possible so that I would not insert those unnecessary thoughts. It was also necessary for me to learn what the mind is, how the mind functions, or the mechanism of the mind, and to look at the mind objectively.

As a result of continuing these practices, the sitting position gradually became stable, and I was able to feel that the mind had become calmer than before. However, it was still very far from meditation.

There were a few things that I thought were important in order to practice meditation. It is said that if we want to meditate, it is necessary to have an object of meditation. I realized that, because in meditation we put our mind towards the object, keeping the mind fastened and nailed to it, it is impossible for me to concentrate on the object unless that object is something I can truly be engrossed in, something I feel is important. I think that it would’ve been difficult to meditate on an object chosen on a whim, or from a level where I was somewhat interested in that object.

To begin with, why do we meditate? It is taught that the aim of meditation is clear—to find the Truth within, and that in order to do that, there are three objects of meditation: the Truth, God, or the true Self. I think that because I was not able to understand the core of Yoga, which is “to realize the Truth—the purpose and the aim of life is to attain Satori,” and because the aim was vague, I could not grasp the object, thus I could not quite move forward in meditation.

I had resistance towards the aim of life in the teachings of Yoga. I had thoughts that there should be nothing wrong for the aim to be different for each person, Yoga is good and I want to continue, but I don’t need to aim for Satori; it looks like I’ll have to give up a lot of things in order to proceed in the practice and disciplining of myself for mastery, and I don’t want to pursue it that far—it should be sufficient to consider Yoga as one of my hobbies and bring its positive aspects into my life.

However, at the time, I also had a strong intention to clarify the aim of my life. As I lived my life and went through various experiences, I had also begun to sense that the things I wanted to do and became absorbed in kept on shifting, however, things didn’t necessarily go the way I envisioned they would either, so I had anxiety about not being able to see where I was headed.

So then, I decided that first, in order to find out the aim of life, I would make myself seriously pursue Yoga. Then, I began to look into and face what Yoga said about the ideal life I envisioned, and whether that was true or not. At the time, I didn’t really understand what discrimination meant, nonetheless, I had an urge to find the answer to this, and as a result, that became something like discrimination.


What is the Ideal in Life?

Concretely speaking, I began to take up things I considered to be my goals in life. One of them was a job. I felt a sense of something to live for from my job and I wanted to accomplish something through it. Yet, in Yoga, it is said that it doesn’t matter what job you have, there is no superiority or inferiority between occupations, and one does not live for work but rather the core subject is one’s own self and the work should be the tool of one’s own self. Even so, there was an occupation I wanted to be in, and I couldn’t just think that a job could be anything. I looked at why that was so, and found that there was an idea that a particular job was great or that a person with a particular ability or skill was more superior, and that I wanted others to think of me or not think of me in a particular way. As I thought about it thoroughly, I began to understand that it was wrong to judge the superiority or inferiority of occupations based on such a superficial level, like the ability needed for a job or what one can or cannot do, and even more so, especially to judge the superiority or inferiority of people; and the reasons as to why I was concerned about how others saw me were ego-based, such as self-love, or wanting to put myself in a better position, and these were unnecessary thoughts.

But then, doubts also arose, such as: there shouldn’t be anything wrong with aiming higher in a worthwhile job and living for that, should there be? Isn’t there value in getting results from one’s work? Yoga teaches that we must not receive the fruits of our work, that the evaluation of a person, which is one of the results of work, can be good at times and bad at other times; the views regarding one’s value are different respectively as well, and that it is strange for your own value to go up or down or for you to be disturbed by such ambiguous, unreliable factors. I thought that this was certainly true, and I recognized that I had inadvertently lived vicariously through the results of work with my own existential value, and that the master and servant relationship had reversed such that I was living for work, and I was at the mercy of work. Then, I thought that, with regard to work, I should just do the best I can with the tasks at hand, and the purpose of life could not possibly be to accomplish something through a career.

Another example is about marriage and romance. To be together with a loved one was something I had considered to be an obvious form of happiness within me always. In Yoga, it is taught that to love is to serve, and pure love does not want anything in return. I thought that serving without wanting anything in return was a one-directional love, that the love taught by Yoga was too noble, and that while it’s good to serve others, there should also be nothing wrong with having others serve you as well.

However, when I introspected, looking at my own mind, I found that rather than truly thinking about the happiness of others, I myself had been prioritizing precisely being loved myself, being satisfied, and that after all, even if it seemed like I loved someone, I was only cherishing myself the most. I was so shocked. Such love cannot be considered pure at all. I also saw my desires and attachments, such that I wanted to be happy by having a family or a lover, and I wanted others to be just the way I wished for them to be. I also thought, perhaps these are natural emotions, and even tried to turn defiant to justify them, but in actuality, there were struggles from others not being the way I wanted them to be, and even if I found happiness for a while, another struggle would be born in wanting to not lose it the next moment—so, I began to understand that I could not escape from this endless cycle of struggles.

Ultimately, even if I was able to eliminate my desirous thoughts, people’s minds change, and even if I was in a harmonious relationship, eventually, death inevitably comes. I began to recognize that the kind of happiness I dreamt about is impossible to realize, and that even if I have a romantic partner or a family, marriage or romance themselves could not be the goals of life.

In this way, centering around the aim and ideals of life, I worked on paring down and looking into my mind from various angles, as to whether the thoughts that kept arising in my mind were correct to the extent that I could rely on them, or whether what Yoga says is correct to the extent I can rely on it, and then to the ultimate extent where I can completely accept it. I think that at that time it wasn’t like sitting down and discriminating, but rather I was in the condition where contemplation was continuous at all times, in between tasks and all the while that I was awake.

Also, since even if I understood something intellectually at some moment, the mind’s thoughts didn’t quite change right away, I continued the task of translating the content of what I had understood into practice, to make it concrete through action within the various scenes of daily life. For example, if at work various evaluations came my way, I disciplined myself not to connect them with my own value, and if an evaluation was positive, I disciplined myself to make closure with it by simply being grateful that things went fine, and immediately moved onto my next tasks so that I would not get arrogant about it, and conversely, even if I failed, I disciplined myself to dismiss obsessive thoughts about it right away and I directed my action to what I thought was right, such that I would reflect and learn from mistakes and then move on to my next task without looking down on myself or continuing to regret something.

I don’t know exactly how long it took me, if it was a few months or over a year, but I think that through intentionally continuing these disciplines, my biased thinking and erroneous, incorrect ways of viewing things were gradually corrected.

Then, I came to acknowledge that the image of my ideal life that I had envisioned would never be established without having my happiness dependent on getting something—dependencies on others and the surroundings. I had wished something that was ever-changing to continue forever in the way I wished—indeed, I had imagined illusions. I was crushed by the reality of my state, and I was disappointed. However, it was also refreshing, being released from the mind.

As a result, I arrived at an answer that the entirety of whatever I thought was ideal was all unreliable. Yet, even so, I still didn’t quite understand that “Realizing the Truth,” which is the purpose and aim of meditation and the ideal of Yoga, is the aim of life.


The Absolutely Certain Truth Exists

On one hand, I was almost about to give up on finding anything that is reliable in this world, yet I also wanted to believe that there must be something. When I cornered myself at the point where I kept thinking that, “I don’t get it,” isn’t going anywhere, I thought that, the answer might not be found in anything but Yoga after all, and that there is no other way but to move myself one more step and venture into Yoga.

It was at the time when I had reached such a state of mind, that I got an opportunity to see the Master again in Satsangha (the place for learning), which I had attended two or three times previously. During Satsangha, the Master said: “The most important thing is to seek what the Truth is, what the Reality is in living in this world.”

“This body, job, relationships with people, environment, ability, everything will inevitably change. Within this ambiguous, vague condition of change, everyone is experiencing ups and downs. However, Reality, Truth, which is certain and reliable, which will never disappear, can never be destroyed, and will never change, exists. To seek That is Yoga, and the answer is already within oneself—that is the certain, indubitable guarantee.” The absolute confidence was given to me that in truth we, every single person’s true identity, is the Existence of Truth, and that it is simply that the mind covers it so that we can’t see that.

From that day on, what was important in life started to become clear; that which I could never understand before, no matter how many times I read the books. (Although it’s strange because these books that I was reading until that point, too, were the teachings spoken by the same Master.) It felt as if when I exhausted all possible means, the answer finally came.

I came to realize that Satori, which is the aim of life taught according to Yoga, although I was overcomplicating It in my thinking, in truth, it was simple, and it was about arriving at a clear answer for being alive, for existing right now. When I recall having that realization, a vibrant sensation is revived in me even now. There was joy in awakening something very important within me—it felt as if a path opened up, to live with “Realize the Truth” as the center of my life.

Afterwards, my meditation changed; it was because the vector of the mind, which was directing towards the external world until that point, shifted to directing inwards, and finally what I must seek began to connect with the object of meditation. Meditation was vague until that point, but by having conviction that there is a reliable, absolutely certain Truth within me, I began to be able to concentrate on the object little by little.

For example, in discrimination, we make the mind battle against the Truth, and it results in removal of what is covering the Truth, so I think that by having a very strong desire to realize the Truth, and by having the strong thought of realizing the Truth as exactly the most important thing, we can promptly proceed, seeing that other things are insignificant trifles. It is the same in the case of the object being God or the true Self.

To introspect and face the most important thing in life—that became the foundation for me to walk on the path of Yoga. I clarified the mind that was tossed around by various occurrences, and I was able to define the aim of life. Indeed, though there were times when, in doubt, I felt like I wanted to throw it all away, every single time that happened, I asked myself, “How do I want to live?” and, “What do I see in Yoga?” I returned again and again to the initial enthusiasm that made the decision to move towards that aim. And, I think it was precisely that that became the impetus to practice meditation, and to propel myself forward.




2 – The Breakthrough of Meditation

December 26, 2020


What is Necessary is Exhaustive Discrimination

The absolutely certain Truth exists within me—the answer I finally arrived at after groping for an answer to what’s important in life, to what must be sought, became a great light of hope for me, and afterwards I was able to push further in meditation and in putting daily practice and discipline into action. When I became shaken or troubled over relationships with others, each time I practiced finding the cause within my mind and removing it, and then course-corrected my actions. Through this practice, I could feel that even though the issues kept coming one after another, they became clear one by one while aiming towards the goal. For the various things that occurred in daily life, I gradually became less caught up in them, and also, even if there were issues, I started to understand the way to solve them and started to be able to switch gears quickly.

Then, while I continued to discriminate, eventually, my meditation became centered around the meditation on God, bhakti meditation. At first, I felt that my love towards God or Holy Beings was meager, so I started with something like admiring or praying for it to begin. I felt that my prayers were heard, and one time, there was a fire that was lit deep within my heart, and my love for God gradually grew bigger from there.

However, after some good years passed, there was a time when I felt as if the devotion that was always filling my heart got locked up, and it became difficult to meditate on the form of God. It felt like the most important existence of God went absent, like I had a hole in my heart that was wide open, and the condition of not being able to get out from there continued for quite some time.

I suffered quite a lot, but gradually, I understood it as being one of the processes, and I had to proceed through it, and rather than getting my heightened emotion back, I had to seek the essence of God even more, to seek something that is absolutely unshakable and firm. Then, I felt that in order to go towards the goal for real, I had to have an even stronger resolution and urge towards it, so I asked the Master what is necessary in order to have that.

The Master taught the necessity of thorough, exhaustive discrimination:

“Discrimination and its result, renunciation, in other words, being detached—that is what you truly must do. The cause of illusions in this world is found in the erroneous thoughts called ignorance. It’s not about understanding it intellectually, but you need to go through the task of eliminating what is adhered to the mind completely.”

Afterwards, the Master told me “remove what is adhered to the mind,” several times. However, even though this strong expression of, “things being adhered to the mind,” stuck with me, I was not able to accept that teaching right away. In days past, whenever an issue arose and the surface of my mind got all ruffled, I discriminated on the issue, and in a way, it was easier to catch; however, by that time, since the mind did not generate many waves on the surface, I had no idea how to penetrate the mind. And also, my understanding about ignorance and ego, which are there at the bottom of the mind, remained only at the intellectual level, and I became laid back, taking things easy, thinking that the time in which the ego would disappear would come at the very, very end. In reality, I should have looked at the deeper parts of my mind firmly, but I think that the mind was making excuses.


The Breakthrough to Truth

Nevertheless, the time came when I was cornered into a situation where I had no choice but to confront these deeper parts directly. It was sparked by the state of affairs that arose when circumstances surrounding my life changed drastically due to the condition of my parents. Looking back now, I don’t know why I became so pessimistic, but the various life or death health challenges of my family, my family business, and financial issues, all created a state of mind that felt like I was suddenly thrown out into rough water, and I felt that whatever I must have cultivated in Yoga prior to that was completely useless. Furthermore, while the situation continued to remain unchanged, I began to have anxiety and doubts about whether I’d really be able to follow through on what I had aspired to accomplish, regardless of whatever environment I am in, and whether it was really meaningful to realize my ambition. Based on what, can I say that I have lived my life to the fullest? What am I truly seeking? These questions pushed me into a corner, and day after day, I struggled and faced my own mind, my life, the way of living, and penetrated into my mind. At that time, too, I was not sitting to meditate, but rather, the mind was constantly concentrating upon the issue, and at times, that concentration became suddenly quite intense, such that I would sit down spontaneously right there at that moment, or simply stay still.

One time, I suddenly saw a clear vision of a vivid chain of karma. I thought that I had understood the law of karma, having studied it for a while, yet I saw clearly the structure of how my past thoughts and actions were causes, conditions—various occurrences and experiences there—getting entangled, resulting in the present, and how as the mind gets caught up in that, it creates new causes again, and this chain continues endlessly on and on. From this, I understood that I needed to accept once again that the cause of suffering is not because of situations or because of someone or other people, but that it is within myself—to reap what I have sown. And, I thought that I must pull myself out from this karma, and I must immediately cut off these chains now, so I confronted it desperately. At that time, I sensed for real that, truly, there were hard and heavy chains wound around this body. I struggled with all my might, and the chains finally came apart with a great sound.

After concentration continued for several days, I then had a sensation of penetrating further, and then I saw imperfection in what the mind was leaning and depending on, and I started to have a sensation where I felt as if the ground that supported “me” was crumbling down, and I sensed something that was still defending myself, trying to keep myself standing even then—perhaps, you could call it the true identity of the ego, this obstinate thing, really close to me. It is not my real Self—no matter how much I brought up the teachings of Truth repeatedly, it did not budge at all. I felt that this was exactly what adhered to the mind. Fear and pain were bearing down on me, and I fought them back with all my might, and exactly at the moment my concentration was extremely heightened, I sensed the presence of my Master and his guidance, and at the same time, that limitation was broken through and something huge burst into fragments. The next moment, the scenery changed completely. In pitch dark, I was floating in a space where there was nothing at all, though I could not see anything, I seemed to be proceeding further. I don’t know how long it lasted, but after a while, the scenery ended. What left a clear impression on me was that the experience of Truth exists further beyond that dark void, that this must have been the entrance to the Truth.

At that very moment, I had the sensation that my mind was eradicated. The state of the mind, as if being crystal clear, where the impressions of pain disappeared completely, where there was nothing to worry about, continued for a while. Then, a much stronger intention was born: “I want to reach the Truth, further beyond that entrance! No matter what the situation I may be in, no matter what happens, I want to realize the Truth, I will never give up on this path!”

This battle against the mind was blisteringly fierce. It was nothing like calmly observing my mind or seeing it objectively, and the actual sense of it felt much more like throwing myself completely into it, and it was as if the thing that I felt intuitively at a particular moment was later learned. Probably, one might be able to delve into the deep part of the mind more scientifically, as if dissecting it, but I feel that it was necessary for me not to intellectualize it, but rather truly confront the cause of the disturbance of the mind, and grapple with it, even if it was hard and painful.

At first, we may start from the cause of the obsessions of the mind or the cause of pain, which are easier to grasp, but if we can then penetrate deep into the recesses of the mind, chase the ego called “me” into the corner, and unmask what that ego is dependent on—pain-bearing obstacles and ignorance—then these are renounced and the mind itself will come to transform. I believe that.


Empty the Mind

After some time, I asked the Master how I can deepen further. The Master said, “Even the mind is empty, yet being content—maintain such a state of mind” … “… if you do so, the Atman, the true Self, that is, the Truth that already exists clearly and vividly, at the proper time, will awaken, or rather, bring you definite realization.”

Being “Empty” became the keyword for my practice and discipline from then on. The Master says, “The time of Awakening is unknown, and it may not necessarily happen when you are properly sitting.” I began to feel that because this means that the chance to awaken can come at any waking moment, at any time, in order to be ready at all times, the state of mind in daily life is much more important than ever.

I also felt that even though I was able to taste the state that is like being in a void momentarily, that, too, was a small experience, and I felt the difficulty of maintaining that state at all times. In daily life, there are various things that needed to be dealt with, and indeed problems would come up as well; however, I am in the midst of continuing to practice and discipline myself to not create anything that will adhere fast to my mind, and to not get caught up in anything, no matter how much I make my hands and feet work.

For meditation, currently, I practice concentrating on the point—the consciousness of “I,” the origin of the “I,” which is in the deepest depths of my chest. That is because I sense that it connects to what is further beyond the entrance. Although I am in the middle of continuing the discipline of sitting for meditation, even if there is no response, to not get bothered by that itself, too, I feel that for concentrating deeply, strain-like emotions that get ahead of oneself, or breathing in and out, are unnecessary, and the target being narrowed down to only the Truth is what is important.

In having faith that through penetrating deeper into the origin of “I” and further beyond, there comes the state where one transcends the mind, and in having the faith that I can truly experience the declaration of Yoga—each and every one of us is the precious, sacred Existence of Truth—through my entire being, I will continue to devote my life to the pursuit of my faith, applying the practice and the disciplines diligently and continually.


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